August 2012
26 posts
4 tags
NEA Raising $2.5 Billion For What Could Become The... →
Pfft, that’ll only buy two-and-a-half Instagrams. (Comment made 5/9/2012)
Aug 26th
4 tags
Aug 25th
4 tags
Major Steal: King.com Poaches Talent Behind EA’s... →
Major Steal is the commanding officer of Corporal Theft. (Comment made 5/21/2012)
Aug 24th
4 tags
“But if its team can make Shaker feel like a real, natural virtualization of...”
– The same could be said about Chatroulette. (Comment made 5/23/2012)
Aug 23rd
4 tags
Aug 22nd
4 tags
Facebook Threatens To Sue TechCrunch Commenter →
My worst nightmare. (Comment made 4/3/2012)
Aug 21st
4 tags
“There are only 11 startup logos to choose from at this point, but we’re hoping...”
– So TechCrunch is now a startup? :P
Aug 20th
3 tags
How I Screwed Yasser Arafat Out of $2 Million, the... →
M&A in alley this morning, Arafat in front corporation. Silicon Valley is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of cash and when the drains finally overflow, all the hipsters will drown. The accumulated filth of all their social-location apps will foam up about their waists and all the entrepreneurs and bloggers will look up and...
Aug 19th
3 tags
Aug 18th
4 tags
Steve Jang: The Difference Between Last.fm And... →
We can use random physics terms to describe startups now? In that case, Facebook and Twitter are currently experiencing a Doppler Effect, according to Ohm’s Law. (Comment made 3/19/2012)
Aug 17th
4 tags
Smarterer Hits 5M Questions Answered In Its Quest... →
Terrible name. Too many vowels. It should be called Smartrr. (Comment made 3/26/2012)
Aug 16th
4 tags
Evinar – A Google Hangouts For Facebook That... →
In internet lingo, “anything” means porn. (Comment made 3/30/2012)
Aug 15th
5 tags
Tired Of Straight Tech News? Check Out... →
TechCrunch has quite clearly jumped the shark. I’m quitting commenting. (Comment made 4/1/2012)
Aug 14th
4 tags
Ignite Takes $5 Million Series C To Build World Of... →
This is not even remotely close to World of Warcraft, or any other MMORPG. Unless you can get 24 guildmates to race down raid bosses for epix. (Comment made 2/7/2012)
Aug 13th
3 tags
Aug 12th
1 note
4 tags
Google Updates Chrome Browser, Now Offers Faster... →
More importantly, they finally updated the copyright year in the About screen to 2012! Yay!
Aug 11th
4 tags
BitTorrent Live: Cheap, Real-Time P2P Video... →
This is too late to kill TV. Jersey Shore already did that. (Comment made 2/13/2012)
Aug 10th
4 tags
If Investors Want More Voting Rights, They Should... →
If Investors Want More Voting Rights, They Should Have Invented Voting Rights. (Comment made 2/14/2012)
Aug 9th
4 tags
Aug 8th
4 tags
Lucky Sort Grabs Half A Million For Big Data... →
Lucky Sort’s efficiency is O(d20). (Comment made 2/20/2012)
Aug 7th
4 tags
Bad Taste In Music? Crowdsource Your Next Party... →
Terrible name. It should be called nthm. (Comment made 2/20/2012)
Aug 6th
4 tags
Aug 5th
4 tags
Facebook Reveals Mobile News Feed Ads and Massive... →
Ads on the logout page? That doesn’t make much sense. Who logs *out* of Facebook? (Comment made 2/29/2012. Yes, people in public places log out of Facebook, but that ruins the joke! :’( )
Aug 4th
4 tags
Zynga Uses Facebook (!) To Launch A New Platform... →
What’s “Facebook (!)”? Is that a future version of Facebook? (Comment made 3/1/2012)
Aug 3rd
4 tags
Mark Zuckerberg Will Have a $1 Salary, Starting In... →
Still more than RIM’s annual revenue. (Comment made 2/1/12)
Aug 2nd
3 tags
Aug 1st
July 2012
34 posts
4 tags
GoDaddy No Longer Supports SOPA →
I would love to have seen that board meeting. CEO: “So, Ben Huh transfered his 1000+ domains, we still have 50 million, buahaha!” IT Staff: “Sir…there was a Reddit thread.” CEO: “ಠ_ಠ damn it.”
Jul 31st
3 tags
Jul 30th
4 tags
Another Member Of The Twitter Comms Team Leaves.... →
Twitter’s Communication team is frustrated that company policy mandates that e-mails must be less than 140 words. Lynn Fox tried to send a letter of resignation to Costolo, but it was abruptly cut off. (Comment made 11/16/2011)
Jul 29th
4 tags
Bill Gross Explains What’s Different About... →
“Part of a person”, eh? So we can literally follow people’s asses? (Comment made 10/18/2011)
Jul 28th
4 tags
“Top tier firms like Khosla Ventures have the luxury of raising huge funds.”
– Khosla Ventures is overpowered, it needs a nerf ASAP. (Comment made 10/13/2011. Before I found Mankrik’s wife.)
Jul 27th
4 tags
Sony Ericsson Plans To Release Android 4.0 To The... →
Expected release date is December 21st 2012, to be exact. (Comment made 10/20/2011)
Jul 26th
3 tags
Jul 26th
3 tags
Jul 25th
3 tags
“Me and a business partner are starting an IT Consulting Firm. We are working...”
Jul 25th
4 tags
Jul 24th
1 note
3 tags
Hack Your Culture →
But can you SQL Injection your own culture too? (Comment made 10/1/2011. DBA humor never fails!)
Jul 23rd
3 tags
Database Admins! Red Gate Wants To Send One Of You... →
Are database transactions still atomic in space? (Comment made 10/12/2011. DBA humor never fails.)
Jul 22nd
3 tags
“Demos will be judged based on the following criteria: - most original creative...”
– - most original creative concept. - highest-level social experience. Don’t those two things contradict each other? (Comment made 10/24/2011. It’s still true!)
Jul 21st
4 tags
Exhibit 4G II Is T-Mobile’s First No-Contract 4G... →
The Exhibit 4G II is a 4G phone? I can not believe it! (Comment made 10/25/2011)
Jul 20th
Extra had a segment sponsored by Ask.com, the “leading internet question and answer service.” I wouldn’t be surprised if someone filed a FCC complaint over that.
Jul 19th
4 tags
OnLive Feels The Facebook Love, Offers Any Game... →
*ANY* game, eh? I choose E.T. for the Atari 2600. (Comment made 10/22/2011)
Jul 19th
1 note
4 tags
Grockit Gets A $7 Million Venture Infusion And... →
BOP IT! *bop!* TWIST IT! *twist!* GROCKIT! *…grock?* (Comment made 10/17/2011. Ah, youth…)
Jul 18th
4 tags
Crashlytics, A Crash-Reporting Solution For Mobile... →
What happens if Crashlytics crashes? (Comment made 10/13/2011)
Jul 17th
1 note
4 tags
New Beats By Dre Monster Headphones Are Wireless,... →
This will make my 128kbps MP3 music sound amazing. (Comment made 10/13/2011. Fortunately, I’ve upgraded to 320kbps music since then…)
Jul 16th
1 note
4 tags
Larry Ellison Cancels Marc Benioff’s Keynote at... →
DELETE * FROM openworld WHERE name = “Marc Benioff”. (Comment made 10/5/2011)
Jul 15th
4 tags
500 Startups Peels Back The Curtain On Its Third... →
There are less than 500 Startups. I’m suing for false advertising. (Comment made 10/31/2011. I should have used this comment more often.)
Jul 14th
4 tags
Murdoch On Myspace: “I Made A Huge Mistake.” →
Aww, I wanted Tom Anderson to make this post. (Comment made 10/21/2011)
Jul 13th
4 tags
“Also, first person to comment “Slow news day?” gets cake. And banned.”
– What about the *second* person who comments “Slow News Day?” I see a loophole in your plan! (Comment made 10/18/2011)
Jul 12th
4 tags
The Future Of Books: A Dystopian Timeline →
This is pointless because the world is going to end December 2012. (Comment made 9/27/2012. In retrospect, you can use that line to win any argument!)
Jul 11th